WORKPLACE ROLES
June 8, from “Strengthening My Recovery” daily reader
“To get help, I would manipulate my co-workers by playing a role, such as being overly nice, being the victim, or volunteering to do something for them.” BRB p. 420
“We pandered to others at work, just as we had in our abusive families. Sometimes we didn’t even know we were doing it until it was too late, and then we had to live with the consequences of having given away our power. This was a familiar scenario. We were re-creating our childhoods.
As we find our voice in ACA, we are no longer satisfied to play the same roles we’ve been used to. Even though we are sometimes afraid of what comes next, we are learning to walk into the unknown, one day at a time. Whether or not our path is the same as others in our meetings, we are united in our common bond -our desire to heal with the help of the 12 Steps. They give us a structure for living that we never had before.
We begin to carry the Steps and the program with us to work where people can find themselves in meetings without even knowing it. We are setting boundaries and approach situations calmly and directly. As we uncover triggers that can still be activated, we work with our fellow travelers to discover their roots so that we no longer act out. We teach others how to treat us in a far different way than we have before.
On this day I choose to be my True Self with everyone I come in contact with.”
My Experience:
Being one person in life and a different person at work has been my modus operandi for years. But how to marry the two? Setting boundaries and deciding how I want to live allows me to be a more complete person with the ability to be the same person all day long. I am much more relaxed, much more enjoyable, and much more honest about my feelings and my ability to deal with things because I am being my true self in all areas of my life. I no longer have to do all things for everyone. I can now allow folks to take care of their side of the street and I take care of mine. If asked, I can assist, but I will no longer take ownership of others projects or issues. What a relief!
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