STEP TEN
Oct 3, from “Strengthening My Recovery” daily reader
“Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.” BRB p. 250
“As we read Step Ten, we see a way of staying current in our daily lives. When we take our daily inventory, we notice where we have succeeded as well as where we have fallen short or need to change. And when we are wrong, we have the courage to deal with it in real time. We no longer shrink from our reality. We embrace the recovery process.
We listen in meetings and talk with our sponsors about difficult things. We are opening up channels of communication with our Inner Child by educating our inner loving parent.
The changes we see are magnificent, and we pause to deeply breathe in the love we have surrounded ourselves with. We no longer choke ourselves with fear. We are not perfect and recognize that we are a work in progress. This admission creates a personal circle of compassion and gentleness that we need for our recovery.
We reach toward the sky like the beautiful seedlings that we are, stretching out towards the sun as we fulfill our destiny. We do not know exactly where we are going, but we know we need never be alone again. We look at our lives as symphonies that are always playing to us if we are willing to listen.
On this day I will hold the ship steady as I cruise along, regardless of what the sea looks like. When I make mistakes, I will remember that practicing the Tenth Step helps me feel free.”
My experience:
The best thing I have been able to accomplish is to say to myself it is ok that I am not perfect. To recognize that I did the best that I could in a situation and not beat myself up if it didn’t turn out perfectly. Not only can I admit that to myself, but to those that I surround myself with in my ACA meetings. How healing it has been to be able to admit that, to say it out loud, to get affirmations from my ACA family that it is a wonderful thing to admit. I get to assess how I acted and determine if it was appropriate. I get to decide who I interact with or not. I get to decide what is appropriate behavior displayed to me and if I want to interact with people that display behavior towards me that I find unacceptable. I also get to apologize for my behavior and not beat myself up about it. In the past, I now believe the reason I didn’t want to apologize for my behavior is that I would beat myself up for not being perfect. So I had to justify the behavior I displayed. Not anymore. Not that I am perfect with my apologies either, but I can now recognize and apologize for behavior that I display that is unacceptable towards others, or not.
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