SPIRITUAL BYPASS

Feb 4 from “Strengthening My Recovery” daily reader

A spiritual bypass means that the person is attempting to avoid the pain that can come with working through the trauma and neglect from childhood. In some cases, the person attempts to jump ahead in the recovery process without going through the entire process. This path invariably fails or leads to dissatisfying results.”  BRB p. 287

While looking for answers, many of us have read countless self-help books, put on a false face, and purchased products to boost our self-esteem. We wanted a quick fix for our empty lives, but we found temporary relief at best. We inevitably spiraled downward into a familiar despair, wondering yet again, “Will it ever be my turn to be happy?”

When we find ACA, we hear the Solution and see progress and spiritual recovery in others. This gives us hope. We learn that the tools of recovery are meant to work together, not in isolation. Many people leave ACA believing they worked the program, but it just didn’t work for them. In fact maybe they expected ACA to be another quick fix.

If we use all the tools the way they’re meant to be used, ACA can heal us and change our lives. By attending meetings, working the Steps, reaching out to others, and finding a Higher Power, we can recapture our True Selves – the person we were born to be.

On this day I will have the courage to use the tools of the ACA program, especially the one that’s hardest for most of us – reaching out to others for help.

My experience:

My Higher Power knows when to expose me to something and this is probably the best time to expose me to this concept.  I recently started the step work and am currently on Step 4.  When I was on Step 2 some uncomfortable realizations came up but I worked the step and the accompanying exercise anyway, so I thought.  When presented to my sponsor, he asked me a really tough and thought provoking question, “do you really think you went deep enough on your responses.”  I had to admit that there was probably some more depth I could go.  In that I was attempting to spiritually bypass the more uncomfortable admission.  Once I sat with it and dug deeper, there was pain and emotion that I thought I was not ready for, but my Higher Power was with me and got me through it.  I had to admit to my sponsor that this exercise was hard.  There was a huge sense of accomplishment though when I got through it.  Then another realization came to me.  There are many more Steps, some that I know are harder than this one.  These initial steps are preparing me for what lies ahead.  Today I say, “bring it on,” because today I have a sponsor and I have a Higher Power that are helping me through the abyss to get to the other side to be a much happier and complete person.  I used to think I couldn’t do it, now I say I cannot wait to get there!!!  Join me!!

The Abyss

In my life the pointless fight has always been remiss

Attempting to keep my mind out of the void of the abyss

Depression is what some might call by another name

But like Hawk said, fancy name, same thing

During these times my focus was oh so askew

So that means that I couldn’t concentrate on you

It may have looked outwardly as though I didn’t care

But really all my energy was focused on this stare

I could feel myself scratching and clawing this gravitational pull

Sometimes I succumbed and was in its orbits full

For how long though I never really knew

That is when my isolation was in full view

You may have thought wondrously, he does not love me

But I couldn’t share with you because I could not see

But now that I do I am sorry you had to endure

The mood swings, the meanness and all the other obscure

Just know then and now I needed you much

So much so that I craved your tender touch

For now I write this because you probably need to hear this

Because of you I will forever fight to stay out of the abyss