REPARENTING

June 7, from “Strengthening My Recovery” daily reader

“‘The first step in reparenting ourselves involves recognizing the loving voice inside.” BRB p. 298

“Growing up in a dysfunctional family was chaotic. We walked on egg shells, waited for the other shoe to drop, or held our breath and waited for the war to start. In the morning -after a brutal night -everybody pretended like nothing had happened.

When we first came to ACA, many of us were angry, defensive and at the end of our rope. We were either in the middle of chaos or in deep isolation. We knew full well what it felt like to be on this emotional roller coaster of life: one minute up, the next minute down.

What we learn in this program is that showing up and doing the work is critical. As we learn the value of surrender, acceptance, love and forgiveness, we begin to build a strong foundation for a better way of life. We learn to reparent ourselves, which means we become our own loving parent who provides our Inner Child with what we didn’t receive from our families. It’s like starting fresh, almost like being reborn.

On this day I am grateful for what ACA has taught me about the value of my choices and how to reparent myself. Each day I start fresh and give my Inner Child only positive messages.”

My Experience:

Coming into this program I was in the midst of isolation.  I was on this self-imposed island with lots of people around.  As I do the work and begin to heal, I am learning to value surrendering, accepting, loving and forgiving myself to build a better way to live.  I now live a new paradigm and reparent myself with gentleness and love daily.

New Paradigm

Convinced that I was wicked, that I was no good

Never really had a chance to be completely understood

Why would they take the chance to recognize me

When I could not completely appreciate the evil that was me

Then I learned about forgiveness, and applied to myself

Realizing these were only deeds which swelled my knowledge wealth

What I ended up absorbing that was the greatest gift to bore

These deeds need not define who I am at my core

My spirit is forgiving, my demeanor is un-cruel

I live my life following my own life-affirming rules

My trueness includes tenderness and compassion in my heart

These are the traits that existed inside me from the start

I was convinced over a lifetime of my sinful ways

I now speak this new paradigm into existence every day.

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